Yeah and it has been quite a while I think the obsession is in terms of I didn't get what I needed. And now him was supposedly someone new who's probably getting a better version of him because he's mature and he makes money now when I met him he was a student. I've seen recent pictures and videos of him and it's not the same person I feel like he looked better physically and maybe mentally back then maybe I'm seeing the world through Rose Colored Glasses but I feel like my obsession has to store into something where there has to be a reason why I'm still doing this so maybe it's because it's worth seeing him one more time or just to keep in touch and I have been on dates a lot and met a couple cool people a one person who haven't seen in a while maybe their schedule is busy or they don't care because it's the summer but kind of stinks and then I think to myself am I am I doing something wrong?