The little "o"

Hey there. When I lost my virginity, I remember being..nonplussed to say the least. It was with someone I loved, who I trusted and new well, who I'd been with for about 8 months. We fooled around a lot before doing the actual deed, and he knew how to make me orgasm pretty regularly. But, sex (intercourse), at least for me, is very different than just fooling around. It took me a while to fully enjoy and figure out what I liked doing most with my parnter. And I ..ahem... was very well acquainted with myself prior to being with this guy. That didn't mean it was easy to orgasm though, it just meant I new the signs and had a foundation. I think most women have to get used to the different sensation of intercourse- like an acquired taste-, and really spend some time (fun time!) learning what they like. Teaching someone else to pleasure you the way you like takes time and takes work. Self awareness and open communication are key.

Also, I'm sure you've read this elsewhere, but very, VERY few women can orgasm from intercourse alone. There has to be a fair amount of clitoral stimulation for it all to come together (excuse the pun) correctly. Nerves, stress, cold feet (literally- seriously, it's science), and other mundane things all can conspire against you.

So my answer is this: No, I don't think this is as good as it gets for you. I know the sensation you're talking about, and it's nice, but it's not main event. The big 'O' is hard to miss, impossible to truly fake and will be unique to you.

As far as advice (though you didn't ask for any...:/), keep at it. Cycle through positions regularly - sometimes it takes time and experience to truly appreciate a position. Don't expect it to be quick - foreplay is key - I've seen stats that say it takes 20 or more minutes of clitoral stimulation for women to orgasm. Relax, and don't pressure yourself. Be open to new sensations, as long as they make you feel good and you're comfortable with them- there...isn't really anything else that feels like an orgasm, so the warm up of one may not be familiar to you right away. And communicate with your partner - you're a special flower... lol... whatever ends up getting you to orgasm will be unique in some way or other to you. Have fun!

/r/sexxit Thread