Hey man, I totally know where you're coming from. I highly recommend you engage in a little introspection however. Feeling depressed and sad after quitting weed is normal, but wanting to die hating yourself are a step above that. I completely connect with those statements because I can't tell you how often I've wished that I just wouldn't wake up the next morning or wishing that I could just be literally anyone else other than me. I highly recommend you find someone to talk to so that you can take a deep look into your past because you may end up in the same scenario as me, where weed didn't cause these feelings, it just made them much worse. Keep going strong, sounds like you are on the right path and are developing a healthy mindset. Message me if you have any questions or want to compare sides to see if what I'm saying strikes a chord or if you think we are walking two different paths.