Lonely

My best friend at the time was going through a divorce, and other than spending most of his time talking about how hard the divorce was on him, never really asked me how I dealing except once where I tried to interject with one of my problems and how they were as bad as his but he shot me down with a 'its not a competition'. So I kind of just did the best friend thing of being supportive but not really having anyone to talk to.

That's so ironic to me. Him shooting you down with "it's not a competition" and never really asking you about your problems implies that he thinks his problems are worse. In reality, your problems will be hard on you because that's what they are: your problems. It doesn't mean it's less important than your friend's problems. As humans, we go through all kinds of obstacles. No matter how big or small an issue is, all of them are valid.

Moving from NYC to the deep south. And while I love the job, its within my career and offers me great opportunities, I absolutely loathe the area. Its just big empty stretches of nothing in every direction, and coming from a big city it just kind of makes me feel more isolated and hard to meet someone, especially with being gay in the deep south. Its also damn near impossible to make any kind of real friends both physical distance between me and another living soul and the fact I'm in my mid 30s at this point.

I live in the deep south, but in a metropolitan area, which can be a bit better than the rural area. I will agree that the big stretches of land suck. The city can be a lot better at being liberal - Atlanta, Austin, Houston, Dallas, New Orleans. The rural, though, can be unforgiving. That's what really sucks about the deep south. I'm really sorry you had to move out of your comfort zone - that's never an easy transition.

I started rebuilding my life again, and just getting new things. Jumping back into hobbies I love like video games. My prize possessions of a very large MTG collection is gone forever now but I'm slowly rebuilding it. Not to play it but more to collect it. It was just a stupid thing I loved that made me happy.

You love your MTG collection, so it's not stupid at all! Anyone who tells you otherwise is a hypocrite. We all have small things that make us happy, and the shittiest thing a person can do is make fun of that small thing. And video games! There's no shame in video games! They're not just catered to teens, they're a fun stress reliever. I'm really glad you're rebuilding your life. :)

Anyway, I traveled here with people from the company and they all know each other as they are from the same office except for me. It feels like everyone just divided themselves into two cliques based entirely on age, and I'm not really 'invited' into any one of them pretty much relegated to being the 'outside' loner guy. And since I'm only going to be sequestered with these people for a really long time, its starting to feel like high school all over again except without the benefit of at least being able to go home afterwards.

You would think people would grow up after leaving high school. Groups can be hard to break into, but what I've found is that talking to an individual usually helps. And that individual can help you break into a group. Having one friend can usually lead to others.

And OP, I can't give you advice, but I can offer you a big internet hug. I'll leave you with the motto that's gotten me through a lot: "When you hit rock bottom, the only direction you can go is up."

/r/offmychest Thread