If you had to date a feminine man, what would be the conditions?

As you describe yourself, you're asking a man to date a masculine woman. Confidence, if it is as you say, is extremely attractive in a woman, but from experience it can only be appreciated by another confident individual. If your "masculinity" is such that a man can't help but let his feminine side come out, you need to tone down the masculinity, settle for a feminine guy or keep trying.

You say you are tired but from the way you type I don't think you have given up. I think settling for a feminine guy or changing yourself are way too extreme options for a 19 year old who has tons of times to keep hunting for a proper male.