so i love my bestfriend but i haven't confessed yet but the other day she said " if we don't get married in future we will marry eachother"

I could be projecting more cynicism than is warranted but the phrasing is mildly troubling to me. If she loved you the way you love her she could have said that using any other combination of words. It sounds more like what's going through her mind is closer to something like "trying to find someone I'm genuinely super attracted to and persuade them to date me is hard and frustrating. my friend likes me and I like my friend enough and want to avoid eventually ending up alone in life so, so bad maybe I should run this past them and see if they'll take being my insurance policy" of course, the reason I feel this way is based on my own limited life experience/observations of people and situations that have happened in my small limited orbit so other explanations and outcomes are not impossible or even necessarily less likely. And I really hope I'm wrong. But I would proceed with caution on behalf of your heart. This sounds unsetttlingly similar to something I saw happen once, and all I have to say is, you really need to clarify what exactly she meant and how she really feels about you, not years in the future, but now. Being hopeful is fine, but if you put a lot of love and time and energy and hope into someone who only has half the enthusiasm back or "maybe wants something down the line if nothing else works out" I mean it's easy when you're in love with and deeply care about someone to overlook the risks of becoming emotionally invested in someone like that - so I guess I'm saying, explore this further, but don't put your life on hold or throw too many eggs in the basket of a person who comes at you with a romantic scenario where from the beginning you're being framed as a contingency plan

/r/askwomenadvice Thread