Hey, I have gone through similar stuff, and am currently in the process of getting better.

First, understand that your confidence will rise the more you go out and do. There was a top reddit post from a guy with social anxiety, and he went through a training where they made him give speeches, talk to strangers, and face all sorts of challenges. He improved and by the end of his course, was a whole new man. I have found that this actually does work. What you do is find activities that put you "at the edge" of your capabilities.

Have you ever had the experience of doing something which was very hard and gave you low self esteem and confidence at first, but as you stuck with it, began to get into the zone and started to come out of your shell? That is being on your edge, as I call it. The more time you spend in it, you just naturally become better, just like how a baby learns to talk. The edge of your growth/capability. If you do that every day, much like an athlete staying on his or her physical training edge, you will improve. If you doubt this point, tell me. Knowing this is the key to improvement.

The next thing I want to tell you is about low self esteem. Once upon a time I had some low self esteem, and it made me feel out of place, like a clown, not belonging, or fitting in. Low self esteem is based in your way of thinking about yourself, which is usually wrong. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy works here. On my own path, I used to wake up, and a million negative thoughts and beleifs about myself would cross my mind, keeping me from going out into the action zone and getting onto my learning-edge. With Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, and mindfulness skills, I was able to easily discard all those thoughts as they came and make myself go do positive behaviors, which increased my self esteem. Similarly, when I would go through something difficult "out in the field", I would use Cognitive Behavioral Therapy to soften the blow and learn to bet through the difficulty without shying away or falling apart later on.

Okay, so we've got "being on your edge" and CBT. Now let's talk about positive behaviors. You should immerse yourself in positive hobbies that are engaging, creative, and active. These are just like overflowing fountains of good self esteem, confidence, and finding beauty in life. For me, I like to play guitar and take nature walks. One is creative, the other is active. Creativity, and being active out in the sun both keep your mind healthy. Similarly, you should disconnect from negative hobbies. This is anything that has a negative impact on your state, and/or keeps you from engaging with positive things. I think these fit well under the banner "escapism". It's anything that you use to fill the void in yourself. You can click on my username and see my thoughts on internet addiction about 3-4 posts back. Other things like that are drugs/alcohol, games, excessive reading, or anything that keeps you from being an engaged person and challenging yourself often. People are always trying to fill the void in their lives, not knowing that the same void is what propels them forward into living the good life. This is a hard step for many to take.

The desire to improve is has to come from within, and that is a hard one. But what I've told you actually does work. Sometimes I am shocked at how quickly it works. Spend two days on your edge and you will be qualitatively different than you were before. That's what happens to me, anyway. The only thing is doing it, and then sticking with it. I'm going to cut it off here, this is getting quite long. If you have any questions I'm all ears.