I guess I just need a place to rant so that’s what this is I guess. So last year (first year of high school) I had a rather large group of friends (7-9) and that eventually split into 2 pretty much and I’ve kind of gone to be more friends with 1 group(about 4 people that was always kind of a subdivision of the original group) and 1 person from the other group. There are still some connecting parts between the groups but effectively they’re separated. I should back up and say I met these people half way or so through the school year last year and we bonded because we’re all gay (except for one person) and they were the first people I came out to and before I met them I talked to pretty much only one person that went to a different school and my parents. There’s also another friend that I’ve known since before elementary school that ended up going to a different high school but kind of ignored me whenever I tried to make plans, let’s call her E. Anyways everything was great from like January to June or so and then it was summer and I have a job so I was busy pretty much all summer and at the end of July or so one of the people from the friend group went to England to visit her family let’s call this person J and also that I probably became closest friends with her out of anyone else in the group. And when J got back I went on vacation and then school started. A few other things to mention, E got really jealous of my new friends that I met and has started a feud of sorts that has escalated horribly out of control and is rather stressful but most recently I’ve told E that I’m going to take a break from talking to her until she stops doing things like making fun of my friends for being poor (I’m very much summarizing but tldr she’s been really rude and said rather offensive things). Another thing to mention is that I think my friends view me as (idk how to say this without sounding stupid and too defensive but it’s my rant so) easy to say rude things about and whatnot and they seem to like to dismiss me as not important. Idk if they actually do that or if it’s just my brain overreacting or if I say rude things that I don’t process as rude or as a joke but maybe they’re too offensive or what but anyways. So that’s the backstory kind of. School starts and at this point I haven’t seen any of my friends in like a month and have talked to them a little over things like discord and skype and whatnot but not much but they’ve talked and hung out and stuff I guess (the 3 of them, J, someone we’ll call T, and someone we’ll call Ka) without me which is fine because I was on vacation so there’s not anything they could have done but ever since school started again I’ve felt really distanced from all of them. There’s also been another person that’s joined the group that we’ll call Ko that I know and don’t dislike but don’t necessarily like. And I think I’m probably overreacting but it’s gotten to the point of when we’re waiting for the bell to ring before school starts and we’re standing there talking they sometimes don’t say anything to me or if they do I’m the last person greeted or it’s just a short greeting or in the halls they’ll walk ahead of me and if I get caught behind someone in the halls they’ll just keep walking and leave me there or if I say something they’ll ignore me or not address it (maybe I’m just quiet but I try to talk at a volume that they can hear me). Earlier I mentioned that they sometimes say rude-ish things about me and that has gone up quite a bit to include things like “this is why nobody loves you” which was said atleast once (today it was said by J after I sent a bunch of photos I took of everyone and photos of my cat to the groupchat, I guess it was because I was spamming them) but I think it’s been said multiple times mostly by J which is especially hurtful because she’s stayed up late listening to me talk about how I feel like people don’t like me sometimes and other insecurities and whatnot that I won’t list here. They’ve also made a separate groupchat without me and with Ko, made a separate discord server without me, and kicked me from the existing discord server (I was spamming the music bot but nobody else was in the voice channel). They’ve also started keeping secrets that it seems like everyone else knows but me and when I ask they just say secret and won’t say anything. My brain is probably just exaggerating this and I’m probably just overreacting and I’m sure I did something to provoke or cause some part of it that seemed insignificant to me but idk what it was. There’s also the fact that I’m going to a concert with E and T next week and neither me nor T are on good terms with E but it’s probably too late to cancel any plans because I have the tickets and my parents are driving. I’m also worried that since it’s a 3 hour drive there and back someone will accidentally out me as gay to my parents. Ka is usually pretty nice although she did kick me from the discord (second time it’s happened in a few months) and T I’ve known since I was in 4th grade and he’s also usually decently nice. I feel bad for J too because I know she goes through a lot and she’s become my closest friend but she can be rude sometimes but I don’t want to confront her about it and blah idk. Anyways that was a rant sorry if you actually read all of that I just needed to say/write/type it. I’m sure it also made zero sense but again it was just a rant