LPT: Tried and tested ways to completely do away with body odor.

Okay, let me see if I have got this right...

Your LPT to do away with body odor consists of

  1. Clean yourself.
  2. Antiperspirant.
  3. Antiperspirant.
  4. Sanitize and dry...the antiperspirant.
  5. Trim hair.
  6. Frequent Exercise.

Really, buddy? You mean that is all you have got? You sound like a friggin commercial for Oxymoron Deodorant!! Do you still stink to the high heaven? PUT MORE ON, YOU OX!!!

Ok quick lesson...Basically (I am over-simplifying here, but the idea is the same) bacteria that lives on your skin eats your sweat and it farts the sweat-smell you are referring to. The bacteria. Not you.

Let me let you in on my little secret, fellow redditor; Honest-to-God...I have not showered in over 9 months, and I smell like, well, like nothing at all. Seriously. I get a weekly wet-rag bath and a shower once a year, and I have no discernible odor.

No soap, ever! Humans survived for eons before Proctor&Gamble arrived on the scene, and they smelled just fine. Ive not bought deoderant since I was 14 (I am in my 40s now). keep reading to learn my secret...(heres a hint--its NOT deoderant!)

Funny story....I have psoriasis and have since I was a teenager...back then I did smell awful--so with the scaly skin and the pungent boy-stink, I didnt have a lot of friends. So one day I am at a friends house (one of just a few) and there is this gallon bottle of vinegar on the bathtub corner where rags and soap usually go to die. Being a crass teenager, I commented to my buddy some derogatory or another about vinegar in huge gallon bottles in his bathtub, and my buddy was clueless to my meaning...as I tried to explain the joke, he started laughing AT ME!

"whats so funny?" I asked him after it was obvious I was being made sport of. "You are, you Sasquatch! Have you smelled yourself lately?"

Confused, I asked my friend to explain why I was suddenly a thing of fun. He explained to me that if, as I say, vinegar is so good at cleaning nasty body things and such, then why hasnt my scaly-ass jumped into a tub and bathed in it yet, since cleanliness is so important to me that I came into his house lecturing him about his dirty people?

I went right home and I bathed in it. Burned like hell, choked me and made me cough, and dont even think of getting it in your eyes!!OMGOMG!! But strangely, after I rinsed off the putrid vinegar smell (it comes right off easily with water) and after I dried off I noticed 2 things.

  1. My psoriassis did not itch. and
  2. My boy-funk-stink was gone.

Elated, I went and got dressed, and instantly I stunk again. The smell was also in my clothes, and I tried to wash them, in EVERYTHING I could think of including vinegar to no avail....until I tried chlorine bleach. a cap full of bleach in the wash sanitizes the clothes. I would discover later that a capful of bleach diluted in a gallon of water in the shower also killed the bacteria on my skin immediately, whereas the vinegar just changes the pH and makes it inhospitable, which is good, but alone isnt enough.

Try puting bleach-sanitized clothes on your vinegar-and-bleach-cleaned body after your next bath and see how much you (dont) stink without any deodorant or antiperspirant.

Oh, and by the way, antiperspirant causes cancer and raises toxins in the lymphatic system, so theres that to consider, too. Unless death by lymphoma sounds like your thing, I would avoid antiperspirants IMO.

I would find out later from a sciencey friend of mine that a certain Ph balance is required to grow most bacteria, like the bacteria that lives on skin. Vinegar disrupts that, and if you can kill them all at once (bleach), and keep your skin slightly more acidic (vinegar), they wont survive on your skin, and you wont smell. At all. Like me.

When you apply deodorants and antiperspirants, you are not killing bacteria. YOU ARE FEEDING THEM PERFUME SO THEIR FARTS SMELL LIKE ROSES!! Quit feeding them and start killing them and making their home inhospitable instead.

Anyway, thats my secret. Hope that helps! Good luck!

/r/LifeProTips Thread