Match Thread: Australia vs India at Perth Stadium, Day 5

In case you don’t know what Australia is, it’s a God-forsaken country in the middle of nowhere full of kangaroos, lions, giant spiders and crocodiles that are ever always trying to kill you. Inside this wasteland lives a group of people named Australians. Australians are the laziest, most annoying and most troublesome people you will ever have the misfortune of coming into contact with. Their entire diction consists of using the words “mate” and “c*nt” at every opportunity and talking as though they have been possessed by evil kangaroo spirits. Nothing they say makes sense and their words have no value or worth whatsoever. They talk and communicate with each other just because, and they live just because. For some reason, these strange beings, Australians, have decided that ruining their own country isn’t nearly enough, and they need to ruin the internet for everyone else. You could be having a conversation about cats, the different breeds, the pros and cons of having a cat, and then suddenly out of nowhere, an Australian shitposter appears. He might pretend to be interested in cats at first in order to get your trust and pretend that he wants to discuss the topic at hand. Make no mistake; he is here just for one reason; Shit-posting. Australians do not contribute anything to online conversations, they can only shit post. Whether it is an online forum like 4chan or 8chan, or a social network like Facebook, Twitter, or Tumblr. No matter what the topic is, you can be sure there is an Australian there for the sole purpose of shit-posting. No one currently knows why Australians are so prone to shit-posting. Perhaps spending so much time with wildlife and other non-domestic animals has had a mental effect on them, causing them to fall back to their primitive ways. Or maybe living in that boring hellhole of a country forces them to seek what little entertainment they can find on the internet, usually at the expense of other people’s fun. “No Aussies allowed” is the general rule you must impose on your website or forum if you want to have an enjoyable time online. Australians are not your friends. They are not friends of the internet. Perhaps in the near future, it might be possible to build a huge online virtual wall around the internet to keep Australians out. Until then, do not reply to Australian shitposters. Hide all Australian threads. Do not interact with the Australians.

/r/Cricket Thread Parent