Oh wow. You know I've actually had a similar situation with a different ex and my brother. Brothers can be big bastards sometimes!

I had anger towards him.. For hurting me. For playing The Beatles while he was breaking up with me when I just found out I liked The Beatles. For being drunk when he's been sober for almost a year just to break up with me when I've helped him get sober in the first place and experienced first hand what awful affect an addiction can do to someone. He never hit me or abused me, but we went through a lot. I'm angry that he'll improve so much so much faster than I will and probably move on to someone who get all the things I wanted from him. To stay friends in the long run, I've tried to choke down the animosity for now so that my last memory of him can be sweet like the relationship overall was. It was sweet, we needed this relationship, and we also need to move on so that we don't grow to resent each other in the relationship.

He tried to get me to come hang out with him at the train station until he leaves, but I felt like being in public and breaking down after he's on that train wouldn't be safe. We spent 6 hours last night having a great time just talking and having fun-- I want that to be the last memory I have of him. Do you think I'll regret not seeing him off?

My first ex left me after months of emotional abuse, and I was so.. broken. I joined the military afterwards. This ex left me, and I'm still a person. I think that's why everyone keeps saying that I'm so strong, and that in of itself is irking. I don't feel that strength even though I know it's there.

<3

I'm really glad you've taken the time to share these things and hear me rant. I'm talking in circles, repeating the same things to myself. The people around me can only say "it takes time.." and "you're so strong", and I'm losing my mind. Thank goodness for da interwebz.