Quick recap here:

I found out my mom was depressed last year, and spoke to her one on one for weeks, but she refused to see a psych. I embraced her for what she was facing. But I did, however say, that she can't use it as an excuse to yell and scream, and break things, threaten to kill herself. Which she's done multiple times now.

I was raised to be independent, absolutely. I am proud for what I have become because of it. But that does not give praise to my parents for saying so. I don't need lovey dovey, I would've killed for a phone call when my partner's father died, but had to ask twice in the following week before anyone said a thing.

I have always had a problem with their tough love. I had drug issues and did rehab for 10 months at 19, on my own accord. I spent months in therapy asking why they didn't want to know anything about me, what I went through, or what I was currently going through. They came to see me, sure. They'd answer their phones. But I would've cried if one of them said "I'm here with you, and I support you. You're doing great". These issues we're present well before M was in the picture. The second I'd bring up something hard, they'd end the discussion. I've been clean for 8 years, and never was asked from the day I walked out how it was going.

Sure, they may not be 'that' type of family, or people. But what am I to do? It means all of that additional support financial or otherwise (i don't want to keep being looked at as a someone demanding money, as I've never asked for it before), falls on my friends and partner when I'm in need, if i'm in trouble. They don't deserve that.

Should I get another job? Yes. Should I even get two jobs? Possibly. I don't own much, but could maybe sell off some things. But honestly, if you saw a family member pawning their own shit to pay bills, would you not say "Hey, hold on a sec, what can I do to help? I can't pay your bills, but what can I do?"