"Dude, she's probably getting creampied by this dude right now while you're bitchin and moaning about it on the internet. You think she's considering her love for you when he got her doggystyle thrustin his mushroom tip deep into her sweet walls?"

Thanks for putting it that way visually. But you're probably right. 5 months ago I was 100% certain she was going to be the mother of my children, that we were going to be married. It's crazy how much/how fast people can change on you.

Instead of a rockstar, it's with some twitch famous dick. She went with him because she apparently could only feel validated by having some star faun over her, which is sad in its own that she is that insecure.

(I think) he is a professional gamer but not sure I'd call him twitch famous. He has maybe 100 followers. Actually, she is quite insecure, she is a very needy person, and from what her best friends have told me even when I was with her, she can't be alone. It's weird that I brushed off people saying that to me about her when we first started our relationship.. I guess I still don't care about her not being able to be alone. That doesn't matter. To me it just matters what she did.

Move on and find your own happiness elsewhere. The best way you can get back at her is to become the best version of you that you can be, and make the next girl extremely happy just by being a presence in her life.

And this is why I don't feel as if I'm 100% ready to start dating again. I want to work on becoming a better version of me, and I hope that I'll find a better person FOR me when the time is right. Otherwise I might just be open to the same mistakes. But I'm not going to lie, I'm struggling a bit after the split. It seems like she literally just clung to the first person she could after she emotionally moved on, which I'm certain was before our relationship ended. I'm not trying to do that. I don't just want a one night stand. I would rather find someone with more substance and more potential in a future partner.