Hello, sister from another mister in form of a cousin here! Long story short, my mom (OP's mom's sister) helped raised OP and I. She's my sister and I may be biased here.

OP's BF is a very nice guy, they have that same dry, sarcastic sense of humor. OP dishes it out, and BF gives right back. BF has been there through private events OP set up to come out of her shell. BF, for lack of a better word, plays along. He supports her I'm events, cosplay, and her Bipolar II. It isn't easy, that's for sure. Especially opening up to another person like that.

As for the apartment issue. She works 60 hours a week to keep up rent, phone, and medical and a plethora of other things. He denied her working less because they could not afford it, but I worry if maybe he feels like she worries for her health. She works two jobs, 60-odd hours a week and that's wayyyyyy too much. But, I'm not in their financial situation.

BF should not want to spend X,XXX on an apartment solely for himself. He should consider her and himself. [Their state] is fucking cold, she has to scrape his car, not him? To me, this speaks selfishness.

Coming back to the status of being marriage material.

She is worth it, in so many ways. BF is lucky to date an incredibly smart woman who was also a model! Issues aside, it's about her and BF, not, "You have X baggage and Y bank account." BF has a vision of perfection. He needs to see her as perfection no matter what, issues and all. We all have our scars. BF has it easy compared to most women!

To be blunt, and maybe harsh on her, I am marrying a man I've known for.. 3 months now. She is my sister and my role model, I've been waiting to be her maid of honor and be proud that I saw my sister marry the man of her dreams. Now, I feel sad that I'm the little sis and she has to see me off. She deserves my spot more than me. She's earned it.