I've learned you can't make people care. Everyone has their priorities... sometimes it isn't family. You're incredibly kind to invite her to your scans. I can understand why you are upset :( it sucks.

Maybe have a conversation with your hubs about what duties are expected from each of you? Use "I feel" statements and don't blame each other. Nothing will change unless you talk about it :)

My husband and I have a good agreement that works because we both have the same amount of 'free time' - time to relax and do whatever we want, together or alone.

I don't compare how much each of us 'does' because it will never be equal. I do all household work inside (expect repairs), care for the animals, and do all the shopping. My husband does the outside care (we live on many acres, lots to mow), home depot runs, home repairs, and snow removal. He works 45-65 hours a week as he owns his own company, I work closer to 40 hours.

Sorry I know you weren't looking for relationship advice, but I hate seeing people be upset over chores! It is easily fixable if both parties agree to make things balanced :)