Thought I was stable. Prescribed champix. Lost 2 days work likely 1-2 more... paranoid about my loving relationship, want to run, my head is talking back, I feel a kind of dissociation but there's a strong current of sadness... it's not the total absence of feeling. My partner said his research found little mention of suicide and it usually goes away. What if it doesn't?! I already cannot function. I'm mad at time bc we agreed the first sign of mood swings and cut the champix & he's not on board... And we're way above mood swings now. It's nearly 4pm and I'm going to sleep. Turns out my lithium levels are 0.3 too so seriously wtf. Doubled my last dose months and it's gained 0.1. I don't even know rn.