So lengthy post, sorry about that but i really have to vent..
i met a girl in 2017, and it was a fun normal relationship when we decided to move in together year after. She became instantly jealous, assuming i had an affair with a coworker, a girl i went out with few times.
Jealousy turned into obsession to the point that my lunch breaks turned into endless texting and explaining myself. Then one night We went out with some friends to a bday party, where she felt excluded - my coworkers and internal jokes. So she sends me a text while sitting next to me saying she is breaking up with me. I tried to stop her, but she left. Then around 1am she called i ignored. i came home at 4 and i found our apartment totally trashed, my clothes on the floor cut into the pieces. i turned around and left. She ran behind me, cried not to leave her, then ended up sitting on a street saying she wants to die. I just got in the taxi and left.
She called next day, took me to the mall, bought me new clothes. but it did not stop there.
She started breaking things in the apartment regularly, if i would buy her a present, when she gets mad she would destroy it, and mind you, these were not cheap things. I started getting anxious every time i receive a text if its going to be an angry or a happy message. I was getting anxious to come home, finding a trashed apartment or a dinner and candles. Felt like rollercoaster.
I stopped buying presents, she started getting angrier. Then, there was she first time time hit me in the face. She started scratching me, i still have scars on my neck. And i am a much bigger guy than her, but knowing the consequences i decided to just defend myself by grabbing her wrists. She would take my keys away so i wasn't able to get out of the apartment while taking a beating. if i would grab her wrists she would scream on top of her head that i want to kill her. Then she ended up kicking me in the face and i literally burst into tears, i thought she knocked my teeth out. I literally counted all the stars.
She snuggled me, and apologised but it didn't matter. I had terrible headache for days, and she would try and have sex with me, and i wasn't able to, then i was accused for being cold and not showing emotions. Then somehow i would get sucked in the sweet talk. Everything would be good for few weeks and then story goes again.
Part of her frustrations was the fact that i was always safe while having sex ( i have two children from my previous relationship and i did not want any more kids unless i was 100% sure the person was for me). She accused me of not loving her enough and she kept bringing my kids into the arguments telling me i still love my ex. So one night we had unprotected sex and next day i asked her what should we do about the situation, her response was: "don't worry asshole, i am on a pill, i don't want kids from you anyways". And under that impression we kept having unprotected sex. year after, we have a daughter. In the meantime i was constant victim of being hit, i was coming to work scratched, bruised, my friends became concerned but decided to abandon me.
We ended up breaking up in May 2019, when we went on a trip and she ended up hitting me in front of the bunch of people, my ear was bleeding. I was accused by her friends and family of abandoning her while she is pregnant, and i never wanted to talk to her family about the real reasons. She started harassing me and assaulting me when we would meet, to the point i would involve the police, but then revoke the charges.
Then we stopped talking because she attacked me at my work and police got involved again, i was naive enough to revoke those charges again. Baby was born in October, and i got soft. We started talking but about the baby, but i could see she resented me, She was using every opportunity to accuse me of abandoning her while pregnant. Then one night, she attacked me again, i recorded everything because i figured it would be the only way to defend my self. ( She said she will tell the police i was beating her. and that she found me molesting our daughter). Once she found out i was recording her, she went crazy. Police got involved. new year comes, she calls me, she needs help with the baby, and i get soft again. So she calls me at midnight apologising for being the way she was, she decided to be happy, she wished me to be happy. We were talking, making plans for the baby, how we would work it out. Then few days ago, she asked me to stay the night, so she can be with the baby, i said sure, to make it short. I did not wake up for the night feeding so she got mad and told the baby she will be happy once i am dead. To make it short i ended up in the emergency, she busted my head open using very heavy object hit me in a head 5-6 times, then ran to the kitchen to grab a knife, i managed to run outside and call the police. But right now i am super traumatised. My friends and family are calling me, constantly asking if i am ok, while i am staying home depressed thinking that she could of killed me.
So for anyone who is the victim, if your SO or whoever hits you once, they will hit again, this thing will never stop. It becomes a habit, its like a good morning. I am left with scars. I use to be a very happy outgoing guy. I am just hoping i get over it pretty soon and recover. I know there is a long fight for the custody and my rights. I never thought this would happen to me.