My Dad was distanced (against his wishes) from his own family. The dude was absolutely awful at processing family drama, dealing with stress, and acknowledging possible areas of growth.

Sometime around the time I hit 16 years old, after hundreds of arguments, nearly violent confrontations, and more verbal abuse directed at me and my Mom than one should ever bear, my Dad and I got into an argument to end all arguments. He pointed in my face and got too close, so I shoved him backward.

He looked me dead in the eye, his voice dropped like he lost a war, and he said, "I don't know what to do. You need to see someone like a counselor. I can't figure out how to fix this." My gut spank, I felt so pathetic and broken.

So we made a run at me seeing a counselor. Even though we had no money, my Dad scraped some together to try something. It wasn't perfect, but it helped more than just fighting all the time.

Years later, I'm in a romantic relationship. I'm now and idiot wrecking things and feeling like shit. I hit my breaking point and start to dissociate....and I think about it, and just impulsively decide to admit that I don't know wtf to do. I offer to get counseling and see what I can sort out.

Our relationship worked out.

So did things with my Dad.

When people spout catchphrases like "prioritize mental health", make sure you put it to work like my Dad did. We could be estranged, and I could still be self-sabotaging....but I won't, and I'll stay committed to growth, because my Dad knew he needed to admit he didn't have answers.

No victories need to be declared at the end of arguments, we just need growth along way.

My Dad was emotionally distant, yes. But he's better than his parents...and so am I.