Men with high libidos who are in long term relationships with women who have low libidos, how do you cope/make it work?

FM relationship here. I'm the dude.

Broke up and got back together 2 times in the span of 5 years. Talked a lot about it both before and after. Helped in the sense that we are together again but I (the high-libido one) got used to less sex and less variation.

I think we're a great match, believe it or not. I also think we won't last much longer just about as much as I think that we will last longer so 50\50 I guess.

Communication isn't worth shit in my personal experience(but it's super important for just about everything else). Not in this scenario. Talking doesn't change your wiring.

I almost never initiate because the chance of her saying a half-hearted "yes" or a "no" will either lead to "fake" sex or no sex. Rarely think about it nowadays but I get pretty frustrated when I do.

I give oral a lot and I enjoy giving it. Never receive oral anymore because she would do it because she "has to" and it makes me feel disgusted with myself to ask.

Sex has no chance of getting less vanilla between us in general. Wouldn't even let me finger her in a certain way since she was worried it would make her squirt(gets disgusted easily).

Love her A LOT but I also think about my EX from 6 years ago while masturbating since she was a freak in bed and terrible in any other department. I also masturbate a lot and lie about doing it often. Fun, right?

I got no solution for you. Did not find one myself.

Please don't cheat tho. I suppose that thought might occur. Cheating is terrible. Wouldn't be able to do it.

/r/TooAfraidToAsk Thread