This is well outside the scope of mindfulness. And if you’re contemplating suicide you need to see a psychiatrist or really any doctor as immediately as possible.

Every single generation of humanity had existed on a planet that felt like it was in a state of immediate destruction. From the Black Plague, to great famines, to world war 2, humans have been through it all. Yet they’ve found the… something…. To persist. We are no different.

Money like an insurance policy is helpful, but in the wake of your actions you would be leaving a void of suffering to those who will be without you.

But i digress. It’s unethical to entertain philosophical discussions like “what is suffering and how do we exist with it” when you have a real pressing emergency before you in that you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts. You need to get help immediately and then contemplate these ideas when your headspace is more clear.