If I can just shed a little different perspective on this - and this is NOT MEANT to be defending the bride whatsoever - but she reminds me exactly of my best friend Josh, in her apathetic nature to the wedding.
Josh is essentially indifferent to his wedding. His level of excitement is maybe a 2, and his anxiety / stress is a 9. He loves his fiancé dearly & truly, they’re an excellent couple of 7 years, but he really does not feel like anything will change post-marriage. This kind of makes me sad, because my wedding was legitimately the happiest day of my life, and I try to convince him that it will be amazing in ways he doesn’t know yet. He doesn’t believe me.
Anyway, he genuinely, truly, to-the-core feels that it is a tiresome burden to have to be involved in a wedding. His dad is a county judge and has married several of his friends, but Josh somehow believes that his dad must have hated that. When Josh told his dad that he didn’t have to be his officiant, his dad was shocked, saying there would be no greater honor! And Josh argues back like, “but don’t you just want to enjoy the day? Isn’t it so much work to have to worry about stuff?”
It’s literally coming from a place of kindness in his eyes. I feel like Josh just lives his life in a perpetual state of a high schooler who is 12th in line to give a class presentation. Just always worries on his mind, and would never want to put in on anyone else.
When Josh’s best friend Tom got engaged, he straight up asked Tom not to be his best man, just in case Tom was thinking of asking. He told me this story asking if he was being an asshole to say that. (Yeah, kind of, actually. Really.) but I do get where he’s coming from, even though I don’t agree. I’d be over the moon for someone to ask me to be their best man.
Anyway, there’s a small chance based on what you’re saying, that maybe this bride legitimately thinks she is doing you a favor. I doubt it, but I just wanted to say that some people like this exist, and I’m attending his wedding as a groomsman in two weeks!