My [24/F] ex-boyfriend [25/M] hacked my email and exposed my secrets to my extremely strict parents.

(continued from above)

As for the email snooping and the email I sent to her mother, she is lying and mischaracterizing things repeatedly throughout this post. She gave me her login information back in August of last year, and I did not login once until a couple days ago when I felt like she was behaving suspiciously and I chose to snoop. Should I have snooped? No, snooping is wrong. But am I glad I did? Yes, because she was definitely intending to string me along for the summer, and as you put it "have her cake and eat it too" while pursuing things with this other guy.

The email I sent her mom was not malicious in any manner. Am I angry and resentful about the way I was treated by her? Yes, definitely. But littlegoats smokes marijuana 2-3 times a day on average, she has smoked heavily for six years, and she gets very drunk each and every time she goes out to drink. I have smoked a lot of marijuana with her, and I have even supported the habit at times, but I have been really concerned about the addiction she has to marijuana and I've tried to dissuade her from her use of marijuana without pressuring her to do so. I recognized that if I pressured her, she would just push me away, so I just tried to be patient with her. She had to turn down a really prestigious internship because she couldn't quit marijuana for the drug test. She actually had a mutual friend take the drug test for her for the position she is currently in, and the same night after she did this, she wanted to smoke marijuana again. I have considered several times over the past few months messaging her mom because I worry that she will never quit without being pushed to do so by her family, and I worry that it is already jeopardizing her career. She has made several other very reckless, careless decisions due to her marijuana and alcohol use, and I have tried to address my concerns, but she gets extremely upset whenever I say anything and claims I am being patronizing and not treating her as an adult by addressing my concerns. She has gone into work at her federal job high and hungover on several occasions.

So yes, I snooped on an email that I was given the login information to by her. Yes, I told her mom about her drug addiction. But she has painted this thread like I told her mom about her cheating because I wanted to ruin her relationship with her parents, and the reality is that I sent a very detailed, three page email to her mom about my concerns about her drug addictions that had literally 4 lines in it about her cheating on me and lying to me repeatedly. As you can see from the original post, she tried to frame it as me trying to bad mouth her to her mom about the cheating, but that can't really be the case if I only spent 4 lines of a 3 page email talking about that, can it?

By the way, to show how manipulative and cunning she is, she posted this on /r/relationships when she knew that I am a regular reader of this subreddit on my main account and that I would be awake, at work, and possibly reading it at that time. She very intentionally posted it with lies to get a rise out of me, and she wanted other people to respond and support her in an attempt to prove to me that she is in the right instead of admitting how she is wrong. Even in her email to me yesterday where she claimed to have apologized, she only apologized for "hurting me" and did not make any mention of the wrong things she has done. She didn't apologize for the playlist, and her first response when I confronted her about it was to block me instead of providing me with any apology for cheating on me.

Just wanted to clear the air and have some real honesty in this thread.

/r/relationships Thread Parent