I'm really sorry this is happening. I am the depressed wife going through ptsd and severe anxiety. I know my husband works so hard to pay bills and he always listens when I need him. However I would never expect my husband, unless I was bed ridden from extreme illness which I don't have, to come home from work and clean. Yes I have my days where the darkness is over taking me and I can't handle cleaning or anything but 95% of the time I clean and make sure our house is tidy and welcoming so he comes home and doesn't have to worry about that. I do my best to make money where I can. I have applied for disability for now, have sought out help and I am looking into doing respit with my autistic brother whom I love very much to bring in some income. I make sure I'm there for him when he needs it. I make sure he knows I love him. I know depression can be like a boulder on your shoulders but in a marriage you need to be extra strong even when you feel like caving. It doesn't sound like she was doing everything she could to become better and feel better. Therapists I find can sometimes be a crutch if your paying them because they say what you want them to say if your paying big bucks. I know that's an unpopular opinion but from how many I've been pushed around to it seems to be the case. The only person who can truly choose to try is yourself. This just made me think what else can I be doing to help? Its sickness and in health but health doesn't come without effort. I hope my husband never has to feel like years were wasted with me. I hope the rest of your life can be filled with joy and happiness.