What I'm talking about is how am I supposed to know which it is if they won't talk to me? The idea of making my friend uncomfortable by showing up at their house is abhorrent to me. But if they're hurting and they need help I'll make us both uncomfortable to help.

The reality of the situation is that I know these people right? So if I feel like that's what they're doing (isolating and being avoidant) then isn't the chance higher that I'm right about that?

Maybe I misphrased, miscommunicated or misrepresented myself.

I did not stalk anyone. My male friends wife was telling him he needed to speak to me because she knew it'd blow over once we talked, because he was being unreasonable and we're both level headed, logical and sane human beings who value the friendship.

I know it's easy due to the internet and rampant personal experiences to assume that I'm some creep. Someone who just doesn't understand that no means no. That's not what I'm talking about here. I am genuinely worried about my friend because when she isolates bad things happen and she doesn't have many other friends so when she ghosted me I panicked.

I'm not comfortable playing the victim and am entirely prepared to never contact her again if that's what she really wants because I respect and value her. However I remain unconvinced.

If you were in my shoes what would you do?

Would it be different if I was female?

I pose zero threat to anyone involved and appreciate the responses I've received.