My [30M] wife [28F] told me that I'm second to her twin sister.

I'm excessively attached to my sister. We are completely inseparable and tied closer together than any siblings I know. We function like twins.

She didn't mean what she said the way she said it. Please don't be mad at her. You can't compare the bond with a spouse to the bond with a sister - it's different. You asked who was first - I think she might have answered you a little literally. Who came first in her life? Who has been at her side "first"? Her twin, from the moment they were born.

Your wife loves you. This is a time to celebrate. Don't get caught up in the details of who got told what in what order. I sometimes reach for my sister first because that's who I've reached for my whole life. When I was 2 and needed help climbing onto something, when I was 6 and fell off my bike, when I was 12 and my crush wrote me a note, when I was 16 and my heart got broken, and every time I've fallen in love - I tell her. She is the other half of my soul. But she has a wonderful man who holds half her soul, too. And there is no competition between us. We are the same, me and him. The most important person in our lives is her.

I know it's hard to accept that you can't rank them, but don't let the precious bond between you and your wife be damaged by this. You are about to bring the single most important person in the whole world into the world. And a time may come when you are asked - wife or kid? And you won't be able to answer. And if, in a moment of poorly worded silliness, you did answer, you would be wrong. You can't rank them. They're different.

I'm sorry she phrased it that way, but try and understand what's behind it. And congratulations on your wonderful news.

/r/relationships Thread