But he's saying he won't take me to nice places for dinner either. That is not "professional appearance" related. And I work in a professional setting, my look is not unprofessional, he has outdated views on it. As I am seeing many people do since they can't get past that to answer the real questions I asked. I didnt ask is he right to feel my hair doesn't belong at these events. That would be asking for a judgement call which is against the rules and it's not even what I would want to ask.

Also roots with dyed hair was a big trend before. At this point my hair could be considered natural color with dyed tips. But again this is not the point of the post. It's not to pass judgement on whether you think it is professional, it's the fact that my partner is embarrassed about my hair and clothing to the point he doesn't want to be seen with me in public and the manner in which he brought it up. I am asking whether it's worth talking this out with him and how I should approach it.

I'm coming here for advice on my partner bashing my hair and you decide you want to also bash my hair? Nice.