Imagine a world where you put half as much energy into this fucking bullshit relationship into working on yourself and finding an actual partner.

Wouldn't that be something to behold.

Every single relationship you have, in your entire fucking life, BUT ONE, is going to fail. Its literally impossible for you to ever have more then one relationship go the distance. The fact you are hitching your horse to this wagon as "The one", says everything about where you are and how little respect you have for yourself.

People in healthy relationships don't post here. Just posting here period is the biggest red flag of them all, so do yourself a favor and cut bait. You are asking for actual life advice with a one sided story to a bunch of unqualified strangers on an entertainment website where anonymous people vie for fake internet points.

That is the equivalent of going to the bus station and asking random people what to do about your life.

Just doing it is proof positive things have run their course.

Your comments that you couldn't live without this relationship is toxic and so unhealthy there isn't a remote possibility this relationship can work under those conditions.

Look at it this way.

If you are not willing to invest time/money/effort into getting professional qualified help, then just admit you have no intention of fixing anything and you just want the attention without the actual work that follows.

Because no one here is capable or trained to help with the serious level of therapy that is required to even make a dent in this, so either get real paid help, or ruin two peoples lives for no reason what so ever.