My deep regrets for underestimating things 4f-mph was capable of

Many of us have been there too. I have 2 degrees, ran my own business, and ended up taking pain pills (prescribed) until my body just quit on me. I spent a week in the hospital in the cardiac care unit at 30 years old from stress and work, and over working, and choosing my responsibilities over my own health and well being.

I understand what you are saying completely. But the general outcome for me was I had to drop everything for 8 months to recover, and give up one of my 2 businesses.

There will come a time your body shuts down, making life impossible. It's best to at least try to stop before it stops you, at least it would be on your terms, not the drug's.

There is absolutely no shame in seeking professional help, and starting an out patient treatment program. In fact, it shows courage, and is admirable.

If you have people you trust in your life who love you, be honest with them. I told both of my parents that I was hooked on opiates as a result of prescriptions, and although they didn't really understand the physical side of the effects, they did hold me accountable when I failed to do so myself. That may not work for you either though, I don't know.

I also many years ago was given clonazepam, and was taking up to 8-10mgs a day for too long, as prescribed, and quitting almost caused me a medical emergency as well, as withdrawal can be fatal.

Give yourself 3 months to taper down slowly, if you aren't succeeding, don't worry, you tried. It's a difficult road. If after 3 months you're not able to significantly reduce your doses on your own, then talk to a doc. Call a treatment centre, you can receive anonymous advice, as well as support.

I have friends who found NA helpful too. Not my thing, but they found support from other people suffering similar ailments would hold the accountable, and provide them support they needed... Essentially they were in a safe place to tell the truth, to others, and themselves.

There are many options, you are far from alone in this struggle, and we here support you being healthy, happy, and successful.

/r/researchchemicals Thread Parent