I’m a guy and I concur with the others who say your friend is into you. While there are genuine people who will do nice things for others, in these cases the friend is usually a dude orbiting, proving himself as a nice guy and waiting to steal you away. If you’re starting to compare him to your BF then what he’s doing is working. If you value him strictly as a platonic friend with boundaries I’m not sure you would be posting here.
As far as the being sick and not being offered the same treatment from your BF than your friend gave you...I’ve been there. Had a GF who got sick and while I checked in daily concerned about her health and how she was feeling, became disappointed in me for not offering to bring her anything. I told her that had she said something to me I would have brought her anything she needed and she said she should have to. Throughout our relationship I always made sure she was fed breakfast, lunch, dinner and all the snacks in between. Took care of her and her dog, not to mention was there for her every other time she did not feel well and walked said dog so she could rest. I offered to take her to the doctor and was juuuuust about to offer to bring her dog who wasn’t feeling well to the vet for her. Her short, one worded responses to my concerned messages did not make me feel needed. Unfortunately, we broke up and I would be willing to bet some “kind” guy who may have brought her stuff was lingering in orbit zoomed right in like your friend might.
My point is that in relationships people build expectations on what the other person should do not considering that other person is a human being who has off days when they don’t feel themselves. To become resentful because you don’t get the results you want without communication spells danger for a relationship. You seem to have some valid upsets that you’re not communicating with your BF and I really hope you don’t resort to venting to dude-friend about him because that’s when the “you deserve better” (him) talk starts. Had my ex communicated her feelings and needs instead of expecting me to just know, we may have made things work.
People post on here all the time with similar issues looking to perpetuate their confusion, or seek out a majority opinion that validates the easy way out. We don’t know your relationship with this person other than what you share. Which is why you should just talk to your BF and not others. Friends and family will always take your side and strangers on the internet will tell you to cut and run.
If you’re able to have a mature conversation with him and you get everything out that’s bothering you and he still doesn’t change, then you have to go from there. Shit takes work; relationships quit without it.