My father has been paying me to have sex with him since I was a teenager but I ended it yesterday.

I, a male, was also sexually abused by two other men growing up. Not for as long of a period of time. I’m just here to say I understand. I understand not wanting to report and not wanting to get therapy. That’s all absolutely fine. Not everyone who is abused needs therapy. The fact you have dug yourself out more then once proves that you have a good head on your shoulders and you can take care of your self, even if it takes some time. I by no means am saying you shouldn’t get therapy, I also still consider if I need it to this day, I have violent outbreaks when I’m by my self sometimes, but it’s controlled to where I never break anything, or have any visible sign of it. It’s always in private, sometimes I do some pretty amazing acts of road rage that in hindsight is so dangerous, that it makes me realize I do have anger problems that I do need to do something about, even though I have never had an outburst around family.

All that aside I hope you just read this part, don’t kill him. I know you think about it. I think about it almost every day. Sometimes I have periods where I don’t think about it but honestly I know I could do it. But where I’m at in my life, I know I trust my self not to do anything horrible like that, because I’m very happy with my life right now. My significant other is my only friend. We have one friend of theirs we hang out with but besides that I’m as anti social as you are, even though most people think I’m “so social”. LIVE YOUR LIFE DONT KILL ANYONE IM HAPPY YOU MADE IT OUT

/r/confessions Thread