My mother didn't have a will either. No one ever even thought of speaking to her about this. We all (4 kids and her) would talk about her passing- but because we loved her. More in a way of "what are we supposed to do without you".

She was very sharp though and defensive when it came to her personal finances. She had managed a family of six, and being a military wife- she did that mainly on her own.

She had several money market accounts, 2-3 certificates, retirement, a duplex, a house, and property in the eastern part of our state. So lots to deal with.

She also loved to travel. And honestly the thought crossed my mind that something could happen. And my family...omg- a fractured nightmare.

Almost a year to the date of her being diagnosed with lung cancer she decided to get her will done. Just intuitively she knew it was time. Maybe we're all like this. Because of the family thing-my Mother had very specific ideas of what she wanted. She went through 3 attorneys because they wouldn't listen to her wishes. For instance; the duplex was bought with my handicapped older sister. This was to insure she always had a home. She rents out the other side and that makes her payment for her. My brother inherited the land. My other sister and I split the sale of house. Then the other accounts were split evenly. I knew none of this, until after she passed. The only thing we talked about were more material, sentimental things. Also, if you gave it to her, you got it back. Like jewelry or special gifts. But this was all done in her time and her way. Her children had absolutely nothing to do/say about her will. She would have been livid and felt very disrespected. Like we didn't trust her to handle her own business.

Unless your Dad is very very old, and diagnosed with dementia, it is his business. I'm sure he has his reasons. My Dad and I weren't speaking when he died, and I was left out of his will. But since we didn't really have a relationship, there was certainly no expectation on my part to be included. Also, I had asked him at one point for his Glenn Miller albums, and I received them. That was enough.

My Mom- she passed peacefully in her own home-in her own bed with her two youngest children holding her.