I wish you could move past this. It in no way defines you. It happened. It is over. You certainly didn't want to stab him and that is understandable. Most of us have had similar occurrences. Mine was in college. New dorm, first week of school. We were assigned big brothers. Ha! How stupid. I got super sick. Mine came in to check on me. Grope grope grope. 30 years ago I still remember. Guy in high school jumped on me. I still remember. Applying for a waitress job, the owner stood behind me and HUmPeD ME! I was a pizza delivery girl, the manager sent everyone else out on delivery and cornered me.

It sucks. And I am way older now. But those instances do not in any way define me. But I still remember them.

Maybe there is something else that this has triggered. A deeper issue that you are afraid to uncover.

Post abortion syndrome. Is it real? I don't know. But most women report feeling relief. Some women report post abortion syndrome.

How do you explain a different reaction?

You are upset about more than that instance. Find it!

Use this to heal yourself.

I am currently holding onto hate over a girl and her mother who bullied my child. I know my rage is unhealthy. But I also know it is me and that I am susceptible to this trigger. I was powerless as a child and hurt and no one protected me. I was targeted and had no defenses. So I have trouble separating my child's experiences with my own.

I am so sorry. If, or rather when this happens to my daughter I pray she can just tell him to fuck off and chalk it up to him being a loser.

I am sorry. It does suck. But there are lots of yucky people out there. I used to wonder why children's fairy were so morbid and terrifying. Then I realized that they were made perhaps to let children know how horrible some people can be.

Not everyone sucks. But some people do.