She has been reading like pro-cheater post-affair recovery stuff, stuff that positions the motivation for cheating as on-par with the actual act of pursuing an outside relationship.

So I am hoping she is going to come around and realize that while I know of and am going to work on those things that I wasn't living up to, it is not legit to blame me for what she did or expect that the solution is to forget what she did and focus on how to make myself more appealing. She is pretty emotional right now.

He was her best friend and I hate the situation that puts us in. Friends are important and I want her to have them. He doesn't respect that she is engaged and she doesn't respect it enough to demand better of him so yeah. I just don't want that to be the end conclusion. :(