My girlfriend cheated on me with my GAY best friend. I feel really mad and hopeless right now.

To be honest with you, I don’t think just because someone sleeps with someone, that makes them change their entire sexuality. I saw him struggle a lot to come out as gay, and his family and friends stopped talking to him once they found out. If he liked women even in the slightest, he would’ve never risked it all just to live his life as a gay man.

He even admitted that he felt really turned off by the idea at first, but when she started undressing and coming onto him, he said he felt like a primal instinct took over him and that’s all he could think about. At first I was incredulous of this, but he gave me the number of several of his gay friends (I know most of them since we all play football together every week), and he asked them to tell me about the times they had been with women... and effectively, all of these dudes had been in a similar situation at least once.

I guess what he said makes sense. After all male and female biology are meant to fit each other. Just because he’s gay doesn’t mean he’s not male anymore, so maybe, in his own words, some instinct actually did take over him and this happened.

However, I think you’re right in terms of not forgiving him yet. I’m not ready and he knows that. Although he sends me messages everyday to apologize and he even wrote me a letter.

/r/TrueOffMyChest Thread Parent