My girlfriend is into bachata and I'm not too comfortable with it.

I don’t follow your logic here. You met her partner dancing. So you know this is something about her that she absolutely loves. And now, you want her to stop dancing bc of full body contact?!?

I’m not sure why you think this is OK? Dancers dance to dance and for the love of it. It’s not sexual at all unless one of them makes it and if that happens, you stop. A lot of these dancers are married, in relationships, etc. it’s nothing but a dance.

That dance is also extremely popular with the Latin culture. It’s HUGE! Most Latinos dance it at parties, grew up w their parents dancing it, and it’s definitely danced a lot in their parties. I know bc I’m Hispanic and there isn’t a family gathering or Latin party I’ve been to that hasn’t danced it.

I wouldn’t try to change your gf. You knew eyes wide open that she loves to dance and now you’re throwing rules for her to not do this bc you’re uncomfortable. Now. That’s never gonna fly w her.

I would suggest you let this one go bc if you keep demanding she changes things you very well knew about her before you two met, you will cause nothing but arguments and she will do it anyway - what you see as sexual she does not and it isn’t for her. Accept her for the dancer she is and let this go. This isn’t a hill you want to die on bc if dancing is that important to her, you won’t have a gf to argue with anymore - she would likely move on bc it means nothing to her, it isn’t sexual to her and it’s something she loves. I would suggest you don’t instill motives for her that aren’t there.

Good luck and I hope you two find a middle ground. Bc an all for nothing, strong arm approach to this will not resolve anything, if anything it will push her away. Keep doing these tactics w other stuff and you’ll loose her. If you love her - Keep her - but accept she’s a dancer, with or without you.

/r/relationship_advice Thread