You’re making it more complicated than it needs to be in order to advocate for your preferred position.

Doesn’t this mean that she’s constantly looking at men as potential rapists?

It does. But only because you injected sex into the equation when you created the gendered implication about MEN being rapists.

In your situation you’re setting it up based on gender and then rightfully labeling your own created sexist viewpoint as surprise, sexist. In other words you failed to provide a correct comparison.

In OPs situation her husband doesn’t even have the opportunity to participate in his situation in misogynist way due to the biological factors involved. We shouldn’t judge him just because biology (an outside factor completely out of his control) puts him in that situation.

If I’m correct he has made an overall decision that he lives in a dishonest society. Why he made that choice is largely irrelevant to the point I made.