I was molested by a babysitter when I was 4-5 and also abused by a family member thru out much of my child hood, I can almost guarantee she had something happen.

I just want to say: Because of that situation I stayed with a toxic boyfriend from 14-22 because he was the first boy who ever asked me out, he was the first boy to not TAKE from me and to wait since we were so young, until we lost our virginity to each other(obviously my "wanted" viginity) and he started being a typical teenage fuck boy even tho he would cheat on me ,fuck "friends of mine", I'd go back, or then hed get other "girlfriends" for s week or two and I'd either fight them or let him cheat on them With me and when he started doing that I kept chasing that "love " because i again assumed my body was what would keep him, i stayed faithful to just him the entire time i was with him I never cheated on him. And only had sex with him until I was 19(keep that in mind)

When i was 17 and then my father died traumatically in front of me Christmas morning (he was put on life support for a week but tand I disassociated years of my life away so when I "came to" at 19 I was alone and found two guys I slept with while drunk because I wanted to feel that need to have my body wanted for "love" but I just felt disgusting

So later I was 19 and a half and began seeing the bf again and in my mentally fucked up head I still felt much like a teenager still chasing this kid like I was in high school as well as thr boy i WAS with in High school. While meanwhile he was in a "settled down relationship" using her car doing everything for him we would hook up and he was with someone else for the whole year and a half we stopped seeing each other .