May I share the things that my ex said that concerned me from our text argument? ... word for word these were the most concerning texts:

It’s so sad that he rather clean someone else’s house on a Sat than hang out with his own mother

It’s so depressing that he would rather go clean someone’s house than hang out with his son mother. I must be a real piece of Shit

(then i go on to talk about how it's natural for kids to want to spend time with their friends over parents and i have no problem with that, i don't take it personally. i remember how it was as a kid.)

Ok I’m a depressing POS in [son]'s life, great thanks

I should just die

Let me put [his friend]’s family in my will and they can take him

Seriously. Why am I even on this Earth? I’m a single, boring POS mother who can’t make her son happy.

I wonder how [her friends names] feel? We should just kill ourselves

This really concerned me. So sometime over the subsequent days we get into another argument over our kid's schedule and at some point i say:

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you need to see a therapist. i will set one up. we can go together. you have many negative thoughts. it’s not healthy that you don’t have any friends and rarely socialize. you expect [our son] to fill the void of social needs for you and that’s too much to put on him.

Then she accuses me of calling her mentally ill and gaslighting her because I said she needs to see therapist.