I'm sorry you had to go through that. I believe you're a woman correct? The advice I'm going to give is probably from a very masculine frame, but I don't think there's any other way, other than if you had a support network who could just do it for you rather than telling you to do it yourself, but you should try to stop blaming your circumstances and just make the best of your life. And for the record, I think women should go through life with as little pain as possible, as it brings out their best selves.

Regardless, many of us get dealt bad hands in many ways, like being born poor, or diseased etc. They always ask, is it nature or nurture? It's both. The only surefire way to make sure your life sucks is to think it is all nature.