My mother is forcing my father to pay child support (400$/month) and my father cannot afford and is about to lose home, job, and end up in prison. Please help me!

Hi,

I'm an attorney. A trial attorney, if it matters. And yes, one of my fields is family law.

Your father is the kind of parent that really pisses me off. Why the fuck do you know (1) what the child support number is, and (2) any details about the payment (as is "I can't pay it)? NONE of this should be shared with the children. This is a father who is trying to manipulate his children into choosing sides. It doesn't just piss me off, it makes me sick to my stomach. This is an argument between your dad and your mom (and the court), and your dad has absolutely zero reason to drag you into this - unless he's trying to manipulate your.

Listen to me - your mom isn't forcing your dad to pay one god damn red cent. A COURT has decided that your dad needs to pay a certain amount each month. Do you understand? This isn't on your mom. If your dad can't afford pay, he can go back into court to modify the order. Do you know why he doesn't do that? I do - 99% of the time it's because dad can make payments, but he doesn't want to explain why he's spending so much of his discretionary income on other things.

Your dad is playing you. He's trying to set you against your mom. Once again, how do I know? Because if he really couldn't afford the child support he could go into court and modify the order - happens ALL THE TIME. If your dad isn't doing that it's for a very good reason - and not one that he'll want to share with you. Instead he'd rather try to turn against your mom. It disgusts me. More so than any of my criminal clients.

I know you won't believe me. Why would you? Some internet shmuck vs. your father? Yeah, I get it - I'd have believed my dad, too. But let me just put this bug in your ear; someday in the future you'll be an adult and all of this will be over. When that time comes I want you to go to the court where the divorce/child support occurred and get the records. I am almost 100% certain that you will have your eyes opened if you do.

Finally - and as /u/GordenTheGopher stated - this isn't your battle & you really shouldn't take sides here. You're being played by one parent against the other (which is what really pisses me off) and manipulated, so butt out for the time being until you can get ALL sides of this story (dad's side, mom's side, and the impartial court records) before you stick your neck out for anyone.

/r/personalfinance Thread