I was incredibly close to my mom (and my dad, just moreso my mom) until last year when my husband and I got married and she literally went batshit insane because he and I chose to elope in his hometown (which we were visiting because his mom paid for our tickets to see his sister graduate). Granted, this hometown is on an island where a lot of people have to save their whole lives to visit (especially someone like me). It was a once-in-a-life-time thing for me to get married there. The idea turned my trusted, loving mom into the most mean spirited hateful bitch I had ever known. For two LONG months leading up to the trip, and for three months afterward, she was just solid asshole mean to me. After that three month mark or so, she apologized. I accepted. Except you can't undo that sort of damage. You can't undo the fact that at the very last minute she and my dad refused to keep my daughter (who we had not planned to take with us) and we had to scramble for child care or make his mom lose out nearly $2000 on plane tickets. You can't undo the physical abuse she doled out on me (she physically slapped me a few times during this time period, before in which she hadn't hit or spanked me since I was a child) You can't undo the hurt and sleepless nights wondering if you're wrong, or if they are just being ridiculous. She can't undo the fact that the family wouldn't even throw me a wedding reception (despite it being my first marriage) when we got back, so as to not offend her. That sort of stuff can't be undone. It changed how I viewed my mom and how I felt about her and we are still, more than a year later, not where we used to be, and we won't ever be. And as hurtful as it is, it's grown me up in a different way than just normal life experiences. My tolerance and expectation of people is different. It has changed me, and it has also changed how I hope to raise my own children. And now they are having medical problems. Both of them. And I am the only one for them to rely on. And I feel obligation to what was, while knowing my own daughter, husband, and unborn child come first, and then them. It's a difficult tightrope to walk -- the adult trying to make of the cost of raising of themselves as a child. It's a lot of pressure. But others are right -- right now your main cause of concern is your immediate family and yourself. Maybe a relationship can be salvaged with them -- but not at any more personal cost to yourself. I congratulate you on the new baby! And I wish you peace of mind with your parents.