So I know you cannot fix a lot of ADHD problems but the fact is you can choose to fix some things. Its just very hard, but as an ADHD I think you will know that when you get something down on your hard drive its permanent and hard to over ride. This usually works against you because ADHD dominates your hard drive.

I used to have a problem with punctuality and deadlines like you but years ago I got a job with small Italian family restaurant and I really, really liked the family. They put up with my bullshit, were good to me and loyal. But the few times I was late at first it was communicated to me that punctuality is a form of respect, and that if I was late I was disrespecting the relationship because they were depending on me. The reason its disrespectful they explained is that the only thing that all people have equally is time. And if I valued my time so much more that I would waste theirs it was not an equitable relationship.

It stuck, because I valued the relationship, but also because I cannot accept wasting other peoples primary asset. I am one of the heavy on empathy ADHD. So it was just making a decision, but also rewiring the thought/logic behind the decision.

Now if its a job you hate this is not gonna work because fuck them and fuck their time takes over.

You can CHOOSE things, you just have to rework the wiring behind your thinking and values framework to do it.

I also CHOSE to quit smoking in a similar fashion.