Well to be honest i get excited each and every time when i think about it and put my self in a position there mentally.

And what's happening now is that i spend hours without feeling exhausted to search everything about the course and feel a little calm also.

Beacuse i have sever anxiety problems , which shoots my blood pressure level high and i was also diagnosed with it too.

Now what's the problem is that when ever i say these things to mom or dad they would just blindly discourage me and pull me back from anything new and would tell me to be more pratical and not childish.

But to be honest if i stick on to the degree it would cost me years and my folks just don't undertsand it.

Again i strongly believe that i will succeed in learing.

But what if things won't go as it supposed to when i reach there? That's what makes me more anxious. What if things would happen just the opposite of what i thought.

What if things get more worse ?