A lot of people enjoy watching the official wedding, where you become married and are not just interested in the party. It's up to you though, if you want to be with only your SO, you can elope or just have a small, intimate courthouse wedding followed by a meal for the few guests you invite. If you want a big wedding, by all means plan one, but it's a lot of work, can be expensive, and is the responsibility of you and your SO only. Don't expect a lot of help - it's awesome when friends & family offer help or financial assistance, and they often do, but the sooner you realize this is your responsibility to execute, the better! You're about to start a lifetime with someone, it's a big step! The two of you can pull off a lovely party and there are lots of resources out there. Don't let yourself get intimidated by Pinterest!

Getting married in secret and throwing a party after, acting like your wedding, is highly controversial and polarizing. Many people view it as straight up lying, others have ended relationships over it, still others think there is nothing wrong with it. I personally don't agree with doing that, b/c it forces your guests into adopting a viewpoint (that a legal wedding and a wedding celebration are two different things) and doesn't give them the opportunity to make the choice of attending something they may not believe is a real wedding. Why risk it? You can always get married at the courthouse and have a celebration after. Or do it all at once. There are lots of options out there but I recommend you tread carefully when it comes to potentially hiding something that the majority considers a very significant life event. GL!