Short version: I'm not diagnosed yet so I don't have meds but i have a lot ADHD problems so i feel really bad about my life.
I'm not diagnosed yet. Waiting already for almost 2 months for appointment to get tested.
But because of amount of symptoms matching I'm 100% sure i have ADHD. I'm struggling everyday with my job so much. It's really bad. I'm working remotely from home, job is hourly wage and there is no schedule like "Monday-Friday and starts at 8 AM and ends at 6 PM". No, just do your job when you can. And it's awesome to be honest but at the same time it's a trap. There is no pressure at all and deadlines are like fuzzy(?) unclear(?). Just too much freedom. After day starts I'll spend all my time doing shit but not work because I CAN'T. I just can't.
It's directly affects how much I earn monthly. I can't work enough hours to earn enough to move out from my parents home. I can't finish my tasks on time (they still have some kind of deadline). I can't do anything except playing games or doing some other useless for my life hobbies.
And I hate it. I hate to have this problems. I'm 20 yo and never been diagnosed before because my parents had no idea something like ADHD even exist. Now I'm waiting my appointment and some how I need to live my life but I don't know how. I can't do anything.
As I see for a lot of people medications helps. More I'm reading posts here about how meds helps more I'm getting frustrated because I need them. But no, I need to wait and wait and wait an it's not even clear that I'll get meds because this therapist doesn't look great for me as a doctor. When we had first appointment he was asking me general questions about my problems and at the end of conversation said something like "Yeah you know but it's not that bad. You have these hyperfixations, right? So you can do your stuff well" and i was like wtf no dude I can't control for what my next hyperfixation will be.
So I don't know will I have meds in a month or I wont. And if I wont I don't know how I suppose to live my life with all of this problems.
(Sorry for my English if sentences sounds weird. English isn't my native language and i suck at writing in English.)