Hey a lot of people regularly think similar things, myself included. But you eventually always come to the same conclusion: you're here now, you don't know what put you here and you don't know what happens when it ends.

There's various books that help a lot with thoughts like this because believe me when I say there are a shit tonne of people out their thinking through things like this everyday. Another thing that could help is guess what... Getting disciplined. Manage your diet, fitness, sleep schedule, reading/entertainment/learning new skills and making goals and life becomes very easy to enjoy.

Failure is a part of life remember to diversify don't fixate yourself on only being a dude who makes music.

You can believe whatever you want but you need to remember that whatever religion you follow was made by humans it didn't just "exist". Not saying religions a bad thing, a lot of people use it for guess what.... discipline. But don't let it hold you down over fears that something that nobody can prove will happen, will happen.

Another thing that helped is finding a role model, could be some youtubers or twitch streamers a lot of them pretty much share their whole lives these days. Don't spend too much time on there though.