That's not a rant, it's a real dilemma. My parents moved to a wealthy area that had a really great special Ed program for my sibling. Buying the house was a big stretch, but they did it because they wanted to give him the best start. So we lived very frugally. And as a teenager, it was so embarrassing. My friends would get new cars for their 16th birthday. They had the latest everything...clothes, sports equipments, gadgets, you name it. A good portion of my wardrobe was hand me downs, I walked to school and had a job to pay for any school related costs plus spending money. And my parents told me we have x dollars to contribute to college. The rest is on you. So I worked in school for scholarships and outside of school to save money. I felt it wasn't fair that I had to babysit my younger siblings after school and had to do chores around the house. Everyone else got an allowance, but all my efforts were just 'contributing to the family'. I honestly thought I was a slightly deprived kid. (I feel like an ass even typing that) My parents kept trying to point out what you see, that just because someone looks rich, it doesn't mean they are. They tried to stress how privileged I was, but I didn't buy it. Honestly, I resented them and thought they were too harsh, too dismissive of the excess I saw around me. But they persisted. They maintained friendships with real friends they made along the way...friends that I thought were a little, umm, too down home (still cringing writing this. I was such an ass) Still regularly went back to their roots. Still opened their home to people in distress. I wish I could tell you I woke up one day and saw the light, but I didn't. As soon as my sibling finished Special Ed, my parents pulled up stakes and left. Once out of the environment, I kind of normalized and came back to myself. I definitely got a great education there. I don't regret being there, but it took stepping away to get my bearings and finally really listen to what my parents were saying. So keep the faith. She may not show it now, but each word, each action you make is seeping into her soul. And later, she'll really appreciate how you taught her what really, truly matters. It's the ultimate life lesson.