I hope I’m not too late to the party but I thought I’d weigh in, cuz why not? ;-)

Weird question, but do you have any “gurus”? The self help/positivity/BPD experts whose blog/YouTube channel/articles you can turn to when your mind is spinning to kinda help you through it?

This place is great to sound off and vent or commiserate, but there are t too many experts to really weigh in and guide us through the storm.

I struggled with the timeline, too. At 3 months I told myself it was perfectly natural to still be hurting, but deep down I was scared because not only did I hurt, I was hurting more and more by the day.

I thought 6 months was normal “getting over it” territory, but I told myself that my relationship was anything but normal, so I gave myself until the 1 year mark.

I’m of English extraction myself so I really tried to summon that stiff upper lip from the days of old, but completely fell to pieces again around the anniversary point.

Somewhere around the 12 to 18 month point I noticed that my default sense of being was “fine,” and post 18 months I can safely say that I’m over it. Sure I still have my days, my sad moments, but I’ve got enough things sorted where I finally feel “okay.” I increasingly have those days where I actually feel blessed to be alive and that’s a wonderful feeling. Blah, blah, yeah, it gets better. But truth be told, it really does.

I always enjoy reading your posts because despite our different circumstances, I recognize a lot of my own journey mirrored in them. I think we really need to find our path on our own to make it meaningful. To make it stick. But I really think you’re on the right path and asking the right questions to put it all together.

I hope the funk lifts soon enough for ya. Something, something, it gets better.

Take care and best of luck :-)