Thanks!

I have a habit of stopping part way in audiobooks and giving my thoughts. Both positive and negative. So far I'm about half way through it and I like many things about it. Descriptive words used to set the tone and setting of the town and it's inhabitants. I had a perfect picture of the trailer store, the old coggers in the bar, her parents even the bikers. Excellent set up for a full novel let alone a novelette.

My only real complaint thus far has little or nothing to do with you or your words. It's the choice of Narrator and the style she used. Over emphasizes descriptive words in a southern accent when California is anything but. Desert rural community or not, they don't talk like that or speak that way. My other complaint is how the narrator chose to make Celia's mother sound. Too chipper and clueless. Out of touch and not believable as a character.

My only real comment about your writing is not something that I would deem negative at all. In fact, thus far, I very much like what I've heard. So much so that I'm replying here and not to you directly in a PM. My comment is that your setting is superb but your characters need a bit of work. Hard to do in a small novelette but something I know you clearly have the skill to do. Your main character appears on the scene much too eager, stereotypical romance novel-ish. Practicality ready to pounce the bikers at first glance. I didn't buy it one bit considering her setting and environment she grew up in. I played along and your writing of her character and personality improved but something got edited/removed in that first scene that probably explained more for her thinking and thought process.

So far, that is my only negative comment, everything else is above normal and positive feedback on my end. I will be finishing it soon. (Family weekend so no time)

Thanks again and very appreciated. I plan to give a detailed review to audible.com when I'm finished.