For maintained add-ons this subs recommended list is a good place to source maintained add-ons. The Crew and The Oath have working "free" scrapers in K 18.9.

https://www.reddit.com/r/Addons4Kodi/comments/lv1w2d/recommended_addons_1st_half_2021/

" i would click on a source quickly see the play icon at top and it dissapears"

This is par for the course without a debrid service. However if you persevere with link after link you'll likely find one that will connect. The sites hosting the content will do all they can to prevent access to their content. It's difficult for addons to keep on top of the changes, as a result " free" add-ons can prove frustrating for end users, so if you can afford the $3 a month for RealDebrid, alldebrid or a little more for Premiumize Kodi will work better with almost all add-ons. You'll also be able to use a few cool debrid only addons. Debrid services are encrypted so you won't need a VPN ( Vpn's can slow the connection speed)

Set up a free Trakt.tv account which you authorise in the add-on, it doesn't help you find content but is useful to keep on top of your Kodi use and you can create lists or use other Trakt users lists.

You don't mention the device you're using but take a look at and tweak add-on settings and filters to be sure the links it finds will be compatible with your setup, device, internet speed etc. If using without debrid a generally the lower the quality the lower the chance of problems. stick to SD or 720p ( 1080p may work but more often it will break freeze or buffer) there are ways that can help with issues, like adjusting cache settings. Take note of which providers play for you and try those providers next time.

TLDR subscribe to a debrid service if you have the funds, if not be prepared to learn how the problems with "free" can be worked around.